About Me

My whole life I wanted to be a teacher.  It was in my heart.  It was in my blood.  It was in my being.  I started playing school when I got a chalkboard for my 5th birthday.  I hadn't even started kindergarten yet, but somehow I knew it was in my destiny.  I loved kids so much and I wanted to help them be their best selves.  I wanted them to love learning like I did.  I felt that if I could teach them to believe in themselves it would set them on course for success in their lives.

When I became a teacher, I put my heart and soul into it.  I was ready to change the world one child at a time!  I loved my students so much that I did everything in my power to bring them exciting, engaging lessons, nurture their spirits, and help them grow.  I loved my job and I loved my life but at the same time, things started to get way out of balance.

I worked all the time and I had become such a perfectionist!  I could not rest unless everything I thought of was perfectly executed... which was NEVER!  There are so many different individual needs.  I had so many ideas on what I could do and how I could help, that I couldn't even keep up with my own ideas!  There was always so much to do!  I was volunteering for committees, tutoring, taking on extra projects.  I had no idea how to say no to myself, let alone anyone else!

At the same time, the culture was changing.  Testing was becoming a real hot topic and although I understood the importance of testing, I was frustrated that it was taking over everything!  The direction things were heading in worried me...what about the kids?  

Not to mention, our next door neighbors.  The 3 young boys who lived there grew into 3 teenage hooligans that were in trouble with the law on a regular basis.  It wasn't cool to wake up at 3:00 a.m. to the flashing lights of a police car and our neighbors arguing with the officers, while 20 or so teenage boys/young men were out on the lawn yelling and fighting.  Ugh!  We needed to move because there was no way this was the right place to start a family!

In the fall of 2004, my husband pointed out to me that there was a "school year" me and a "summer" me.  I knew what he meant.  Summer me was sooo much more fun!!!  I read.  I gardened.  I did projects around the house.  I enjoyed nature.  I tried new things.  I worked out.  I laughed with my friends.  I had fun with my husband.  I loved my life!  Who isn't more fun when they're on vacation, right?  But for me, I knew it was more than that.

My stress level during the school year had become very intense.  I got a lot of headaches.  I was sick a lot.  I had very little energy to do anything more than work.  I was in my early thirties, had no children of my own, and the career I always dreamed of, but I was already so burnt out!

I was afraid that I would never get to have my own children because I didn't have time for them.  I was afraid that now that I was an adult, that was it.  Maybe fun times and dreams were only for the young.  But that just didn't feel right!  I couldn't let that be my reality!  I wanted to help people AND have a healthy, balanced life!  But how?

The following spring we took a big leap of faith and moved up north.  I had just earned my master's degree and got an awesome job working as a Literacy Consultant for TBAISD.  Talk about perfect timing!  I loved working with teachers and loved that I was still positively impacting children's lives.  Things really fell into place in our move and I knew it was exactly where we needed to be.

Life was slower.  We were immersed in nature.  There were beautiful lakes and rivers all over the place.  We lived in one of the most beautiful places in the world.  It was amazing!  My stress level was still kind of high but my job allowed more time for me to be myself outside of work hours, and it was just what I needed.  A step.

In the spring of 2007, I bought a book called, The Secret.  Have you read it?  To me, this book was magical.  Doors opened inside my brain.  I felt like it was buzzing with electricity and aliveness.  As I read, I felt like I was stepping toward a brand new life.  It was definitely a big shift in my thinking and being.  I had always known I had the power to create my own life, yet somehow it felt different now.  The words I read empowered me in a way that changed me forever.    

In April, I had my first daughter.  I had spent the entire year trying to figure out how we could afford for me to work half time.  I decided we couldn't.  I made arrangements with my boss to come back 2/3 time.  I was scheduled to return to work in August.  In July, after visiting a daycare, I found myself sitting in my rocker, holding my infant daughter and sobbing my heart out.  I just couldn't do it.

I had no idea how I was going to take her to daycare when I knew that I always wanted to stay home with my babies.  I had no idea how I was going to be able to give my all at my job and still give her my all.  I had no idea how I was going to be the kind of mom I had always wanted to be and still do a great job as a consultant.  And where did wife fit in?  Daughter?  Friend?  And what about me just being me?

November 2000 journal entry...I declared what I wanted!  In 2007, I had to honor it!

I did what I had to do.  I followed my heart.  Luckily, I have a husband who wanted the same thing.  We made a plan and the plan was this:  We're gonna do our best and make it work!  Period. Not too many details and deadlines to that plan, but sometimes those are the best kinds of plans!  With this plan, there was no failure, the only option was to just DO it!!!

So I put it out there to the Universe and asked God for guidance.  I believed the best that I could that it was all going to work out.  I trusted that I would attract what I needed into my life to make it all happen.

It's pretty amazing what you can create when you become clear on what you really want.  When you prioritize your wants and focus on what you DO want instead of what you don't, when you think positive thoughts, believe in yourself and take action, you program yourself to attract those things and the Universe works on your behalf!  It's been almost 9 years since I quit my job and trust me, it hasn't all been easy!  I have tons of stories for you, that's for sure!

I learned so much about myself, like how much I love taking pictures of nature.  How I love painting walls with a brush!  How much I love gardening and how much I love diy projects.  I also learned that even if I was home with my baby, "living the dream," I could still create a stressful life for myself with thoughts of worry, stress, lack, not enough, etc.  I learned to become really conscious of my thoughts and really start living a peaceful, more conscious and "present" life.   But the most amazing thing is this, I was able to make dreams happen for myself that I had no idea how they were going to be possible!  I just kept taking steps, even during the most fearful of times, and soon things started coming together.

Lake Michigan near Petoskey

My whole life is different now.  I have two beautiful healthy daughters.  I take care of myself.  I'm rarely sick or stressed and I've started my own business.  My husband went from working super long hours at jobs he didn't really like, to working from home and making his own schedule.  And though we loved living up north, we were tired of being so cold all the time so we took another leap and decided to move to warm and sunny San Antonio, Texas!  We now live near my family and love our neighbors and neighborhood, our school, and all of the awesome things our town has to offer!

My Fun and Crazy Family!!!  Still Michigan fans!  

My life isn't always perfect now, I just want you to know that.  I have had many ups and downs, lots of crazy adventures...some fantastic and some I wish I didn't have to go through!  But now that I'm on the other side, I appreciate the lessons and wisdom I've gained!  It always ends up like that even if it takes a while, because I'm always practicing and looking for the good that can come out of a tough situation.  When I started my 30's, I feared it was the beginning of the end of having dreams and living a fun life, but now that I'm in my 40's, I love my life and it just keeps getting better!  I can't wait to see what awesome things will happen in the future and I want to share my stories with you because I want you to know too...You can change your life!  You can be happy!  You can be healthy!  You can create what you want to create!  Just keep believing in yourself and in your dreams and keep moving forward!

Love to You!